self-knowledge

When the universe sleeps.

It was an ordinary day, I was sitting on the balcony, as if I was in terrible pain and it wasn’t a physical one, it was an inside one. It was another day when I was feeling depressed.

I felt a huge emptiness in my stomach.

I felt helpless, I couldn’t change my mood.. I could not recover, all I felt was a great failure.

I wanted to do more, to risk more, to love more, to believe in myself more. Something inside said „just do it” but my mind slowed down.

I wish I was another one, that I could do whatever I wanted. I would have a long list of things I wanted to apply but I was too afraid to take a step forward.

My ambition and motivation had died to this day. It’s too hard to get up. Or I’m too cowardly. I have a wounded heart and an exhausted mind.

*fragment from my journal*
photo source: Pinterest
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